It’s so awesome to have you join in.
I want to take a few minutes to just share something that I learnt the other day it’s a time that having a crisis of self belief actually showed me the secret to really influence and again real it’s I’m just I want to share with you my heart in the sense that you know we all have struggles we don’t normally maybe share them as much as we should because you know when you’re going through something there’s someone somewhere who has gone through the same pain and would actually benefit from hearing what you’ve gone through.
That’s all so much of what I believe and that’s really why I take the time to come online to share with you guys because I like you to be able to learn from what I myself have learnt and which I’ve never been you know it’s not been as easy as it looks.
So yeah but so I have this crisis of self belief this is how it started out by the way so I was not getting a certain situation happened to me a couple weeks ago I wasn’t I didn’t get the I can’t even get the attention I thought that I deserved yeah.
I mean think about it in the way it happens to us all the time I mean an example is how you probably don’t get the you know your best friend doesn’t ask you your best friend who you put your best friend’s it doesn’t ask you to be their best mate at the wedding you know that’s one example.
Another example is how maybe you don’t get the raise at work that you thought you deserved right or maybe the present you so you’re really close with oh you know they had a very fatty and they didn’t invite you so it happens in so many different ways and for me that happened a couple of weeks ago and you know what it actually made me start to really doubt start to really rethink that really Wanda oh my goodness am I the friend that I thought I was or am I the person that I thought other people knew me to be you know and if it’s so funny how these things happen.
I realize that enemies come back it so it always makes us introverted it always makes us think about oh my goodness what did I do wrong, what am I not doing or what I had not done so yeah and so on.
By the way when you check in just say hey I’ll give you a shout-out even when you come back on the replay I’d love it love at love to like hear your thoughts so what is I mean you have a crisis a crisis of self-belief we all of our crisis of self-doubt so to speak.
It’s actually when you doubt yourself and yourself belief goes shooo down to the dumps and we all have these times.
I can bet you money that every single human being on this planet has these times I’ve had them I’m pretty sure you’ve probably had them as well the most the richest most successful people have had them the people who probably are not as you know well-off have had them everybody has an it’s like this thing that just makes all people it levels a facial so to speak it’s a thing that all humans go through so it made me think actually because the funny thing is it literally, it’s led to me just really not only thinking myself really thinking like business it left me reaping you so many things many relationships my meaning in life why does it have to go there but it does my meaning in life like oh my goodness am I not achieving my purpose and it did by the way you guys and then I talked about this.
I can’t talk about it in hindsight in that feel that way but when I was going through it was quite it was quite serious I mean I think that a couple of things that really helped me get out of it and I thank God for my husband who’s so gifted and so talented in just you know being able to also connect with people he he’s not someone who holds they would have friends of self-belief in the same way present himself done deceive me that I would so his insight was so valuable and I just the thing I think also the things that I’ve learned but I want I’ve learned really is.
I wanted to share with you but one of the things that I learned number one is that when you go through a pain it shows you that what you’re doing needs to change right so in this case has been through this emotional pain and oh really questioning who am I what am I doing and that pain is a good thing because it helped me know what I need to change.
So when you go through pain it actually helps us to realize what we need to change think about you know kids go through pain in different ways you know they go through growing pains which is a real thing just ask a kid who’s premolars and molars are growing pains are a real thing or you know a kid who’s just really just general green things it’s not something you can see physic Kelly you’re not even aware of the growing happening but the pain shows you that the growing is taking place right.
So that’s firstly the kids go through pain then the second or the kids go through pain is when they their I’ve actually hurt themselves they’ve done the wrong thing they’ve climbed up on that tree like you told them not to try to jump when the broken their leg so that’s a pain that really tells you I will stop you need to stop doing this so that’s why pain is a good thing Tim actually helps you know it helps you know you’re living by the way and it also helps you know that what you’re doing is he changed.
So for me was really it was really nice because it helped me realise that yeah it’s true what I’m doing mister change you know and in this case for me it was in the way that I was actually developing my relationships and my networks that needed to change in this particular instance I needed to change something and what it is that I needed to change is now point number two that I wanted to share.
What happened is what I needed in sorry I have a bit of a sniffle so I’ll just probably try and clean as we chat so what needed to change is that um I need to stop thinking about it being about what I could get but really change to it being about what I am giving okay.
So it’s never about it’s not about what you can get the accolades and recognition the loyal amazing friends not at all it’s about what you’re giving and nothing really come stand some up to me more than when I was earlier today.
Anyway we’re having a study and a leader who studied leaving and she’s a phenomenal woman she’s really made such a great impact in my life this past year so to speak you know since I’ve been involved with the study my Bible study and I just really as I’m actually hey you know what real influence is actually about giving it’s not about going there to think what can I get, what can I have you know and I’m trying it’s not about going to think what can I have what I can get like what kind of get what’s coming to me what do I deserve no.
It’s actually about giving because this for me it just meant shifting my focus to be more focused on how I can give, how I can bless others, how I can influence others, how I can make allies better, how I can help them achieve the purpose they are achieving, how I can connect with them, you know and really with no expectation to get that I mean if you’ve given me the next section should get that obviously it’s a bit obvious you’re gonna use people but you know when giving and this has been so phenomenal I feel like it’s moved me from that place that that place of really self doubt and self going to the place where I’m you know you fee you get powerful just you know the Bible says it’s more blessed to give than to receive for reason as a giver you’re actually unlocking heavenly principles and you’re unlocking principles of the world or the universe that will then bring back to you know it’s a really powerful principle and it just really sets you up in a place where you know you it set you up for success so to speak.
So that’s something that was so enlightening for me when I met that and for you guys too because it’s really not think about it it’s not about what you’re getting it’s about what you are giving so whenever you think oh my goodness I should have been getting that, I should have gotten that recognition I should have got that person signing up, I should have gotten that person inviting me to this and that you think about it all wrong think about what could I do for that to that person to help them have a better week what could I do to that person have them have a better day think about what you could be giving or what you can give and I’ll totally shift your focus and this is for me the thing that really made a difference to realize that I need to stop thinking of what I can get what I should be getting and think of what I could be giving.
Then of course number three says to give without expectation you want to give in a way that you couldn’t happen people in every way you don’t give expecting.
I mean you know kids how and they’re all nice and good because they’re like they’re gonna ask you for something later you can drink of it in all sorts of ways I mean we you know you actually would see them do that and you’d walk away wondering okay so why is this why this child you know doing this and I just realize I don’t actually have my headsets on but I hope that the whole you movie okay just realize that nevertheless right yeah so that’s it that’s my that was my story that’s the story that I wanted to share guys that whenever you have a crisis or you have any pain going on in your life you need to think – okay this thing is a good thing what can it show me and then think –
If you’re trying to build a network if even if you’re trying to build your business and you’re wondering why it’s not happening guess what you’re probably trying to focus too much on taking then on giving so try it just right for a while try and give instead of take and you’ll be amazed.
I mean I think how really in the week after that I haven’t even that yesterday got for my cousin had spoken to about joining my program with my coaching program I must say I wrote them she got in touch with me to say hey what’s the link for signing up again I really wanted to do it but you know as other things came up I wasn’t able to like commit to it at that time.
So it’s amazing how it just comes back because then, I didn’t decide all what if I decided I’m writing her off I’m not gonna focus I’m not gonna feel that relationship anymore.
Some people do need time before they get to the point where I can say yes to what you’re giving them or to whatever service that you’re offering them.
So give people time as well yeah. I hope that you find that useful and do put in the comments what has been some of your has as I discussed this and what are some of the things that really make you feel hmm am I worth it? Am I good enough? why am I not getting this or that at the other and what would you like to do differently going forward?
Awesome thank you guys look forward to catching up this is a quickie and yeah this is so good to hang out with you guys as usual